In defense of marriage: A rebellious viewpoint

Before anyone launches on me, let me state what should be considered obvious: Marriage is a holy relationship between a man and a woman, designed to last a lifetime, and intended to provide Godly children to perpetuate the faith. It is intended to be a model of the unity and community that exists between the three members of the Trinity. It is intended as an earthly representation of God, modeled to those around us here on earth. I could quote Scripture here, but you all (hopefully) already know those.

Now on to the controversy….

Shouldn’t we be working on restoring marriages, strengthening marriages, and reinforcing marriages within the Church before we go about defining what it is? I know this is heresy and someone might just take away my Wesleyan membership card for stating it, but when the divorce rate IN THE CHURCH is as high or higher than that of the populace at large, how can we as a church go around demanding that government restrict its legal sanctioning of marriage to that of the traditional Biblical definition?

I think this is a case of us needing a telephone-pole extraction from our own corneas prior to our performing ocular surgery on those with whom we disagree. We are screaming to uphold a Biblical model of marriage. Are we indeed modeling it ourselves? If we aren’t, how can we expect others to accept our self-proclaimed moral authority? Are we then any better than the Pharisees who were so despised by Jesus for their hypocrisy?

The time and effort expended in the fight against so-called ‘gay marriage’ (which I consider to be an oxymoronic phrase) could be so much better and more effectively spent strengthening marriages within the Body of Christ. The best argument is often a good example. Jesus said that when He told us to let our light shine among men so they could see our good works and glorify God. How brightly is our light shining when men sneak into their mancaves to scope out naked babes on the Web? Can anyone read by the light emitted when husbands demean their wives openly and publicly? Is there any luminescence generated by someone imposing their own selfish wishes, desires, and demands on their partner? When someone is sleeping with someone to whom they’re not married? When someone fantasizes about escaping with a TV or movie star while ignoring the one they’ve pledged their love to, sitting next to them, starving for even a morsel of affection? The list goes on. And I haven’t even mentioned abusive relationships, overwork, abandonment—both physical and psychological, and just plain old mean-spiritedness. Is it any wonder when proponents of same-sex marriages say they are not desecrating marriage? Friends, we don’t have to worry about homosexuals devaluing marriage: we’ve done a pretty good job of that all by ourselves.

Please, please, please…go to your husband or wife now. Tell them you’re sorry for the way you’ve made them feel, for the things you’ve done to hurt or devalue them. Whether you had a fight today, or you’ve been estranged for a while, it’s still worth saving. There’s still time. Don’t throw away what God built. The best defense of marriage is a strong marriage. Strong enough to withstand catastrophe, strong enough to endure storms, strong enough to make it through whatever you or I can do to destroy it. A cord of three strands is not easily broken, Ecclesiastes tells us. Invite Jesus into your marriage. Let Him be the third strand. Become involved with other couples, and keep each other accountable to the vows you’ve made to God and to your spouse. Once we’ve strengthened and saved the crumbling marriages in our homes, our churches, our families, our communities,…..THEN we might have some ground on which to stand against any encroachment on God’s plan for marriage.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go and beg my wife’s forgiveness.